Book Recommendation: How Kyoto Breaks Your Heart

Posted On May 27, 2023

Hi Readers! I was completely subsumed in the Stormlight Archive world for the majority of this month. I read the third book in the series, Oathbringer. This was the main reason for delay in all the book reviews. But, I have now caught up with reviews of almost all the books I read this month. This book is one that truly touched my heart. I had high standards as it was recommended by my favorite bookstagrammers. And, it certainly did not disappoint. It’s a short but mighty book.

~~GOODREADS DESCRIPTION~~

How Kyoto Breaks Your Heart is a collection about the ways in which heartbreak can fill a place and make it impossible to stay.

‘It is early October now, a warm, sunny afternoon with a dreamlike cast, and we’re harvesting persimmons. The tree is still lush and green; in a few weeks it will be bare, scattering leaves in a brilliant carpet of mottled tangerine and vermillion. She shimmies up the ladder and snips away at the fruit-laden boughs with red shears. I catch them – mostly – and prise the persimmons from the branches by their calyxes. If I close my eyes I can still hear our peals of laughter, her yelps and curses as some fruit falls into the roof gutters.’

~~THOUGHTS~~

This is the kind of book I did not know existed until I saw wonderful reviews on Instagram. Reading their thoughts on the book, I knew I had to read it. Funnily enough, the Goodreads blurb doesn’t give anything away, but it also gives you no idea what the book is about. But, at that point, no one would have stopped me from reading it.

How Kyoto Breaks Your Heart is the kind of book wherein readers have different opinions based on their own life experiences. Just in about 96 pages, it works on several different levels. To me, I found the constant theme of ‘belonging’ to be the most overwhelmingly intimate. A job. A city. A friendship. Do you belong in your team of colleagues and the company as a whole? Do you belong in a city which is not your home? Do you truly belong in a friendship? And as a reader, do you belong in the environment of this book?

~~BELONGING IN A CITY~~

Having lived a sheltered life, I do not have any life experiences about living in a different city or working in multiple jobs. I have lived in my current city Mumbai all my life. I love it here with all its faults. I also spend time in another city Pune from time to time. And somehow, Pune feels more like home to me than Mumbai. And the reason for that is just completely unbeknownst to me. It all boils down to how the city makes you feel, I suppose. I love the unabashed honesty that Pune offers. I love the laid-back style of the people there. I love how the roads are full of women covered in scarf and sun coat riding on their scooters all over the city. I love how the city has a heritage for several arts. More so, I love how the city’s vibes align with my own. But, be it Mumbai or Pune, both are my home cities.

In the book, we see the Malaysian-Chinese protagonist find a sense of belonging in Japan. To feel that when people can be judgemental and racist can be quite difficult. So, it’s not just about the city anymore, but also about the society. And yet, we see how she carves her little world in comfort places in Kyoto. The sense of belonging in Kyoto is as natural to her as the sense of belonging I feel in Pune.

~~BELONGING IN A JOB~~

I have been at my first and current job for six years. It started off rocky wherein I was not sure if I liked it. Then, slowly it became familiar and perhaps interesting. In these six years, I worked in different roles, all challenging ones. Do I sometimes wonder if I am too comfortable in my job? Do I sometimes wonder if I have anything more to gain from this job? Do I sometimes wonder what’s out there for me? Of course. But, I know myself and my role well enough to know the answers to these questions too. It takes a while to really feel like you are an important person in a team and even more time in an organization as a whole (especially when there are over 600000 employees.) It takes a while to know you are respected and trusted enough to be empowered at your job. But, when I wonder, I know that everyone in my Team must feel that sense of belonging. As for belonging in the field I chose, which is, Human Resources… I wonder about that too. But, I have seen myself grow for the better because I chose HR, so isn’t that something?

As for the author, exploring jobs in retail, customer service, travel and then journalism was so interesting to read. The grass is always greener. We think that travel agents must love their jobs because they get to travel all the time. But, we never understand that they might have been to that same place 50 times and now find it mundane. The way the author explored different fields until she found the one where she found her sense of belonging was inspirational to read. You have to belong not just with the people you work with, but also the field of your work. And the latter aspect which is written in the novel is not explored upon as much. So, I loved to be on that journey of discovery.

~~BELONGING IN A FRIENDSHIP~~

More so than anything else, this book talks about belonging in a friendship. It feels weird to say that, doesn’t it? Friends are kind of like your found family, so why do we need to talk if we belong with our friends? I suppose that’s why there is so little literature on the topic.

Writing about lost friends is painful, whether you leave them or are the one who gets left. I have been in both the scenarios, so I understand the emotions all too well. Every friendship has its ups and downs, so even when it is over, there are always some good memories that we cling to. The pain is too much, no matter how much time passes, as is the remorse, regrets and ‘what if’ stories that we keep telling ourselves. And yet, with so many people having lost so many friends, we have so little content (books/movies) that talk about this all too painful event with all too many dilemmas.

In this book, you really feel for the author. She and her flatmate went from being close friends to nothing at all with no explanations. Friendships that sink with no possible closures hurt so much more because there is a lifetime of questions you have in your mind. Was it your fault? What could you have done differently? Was it something you did on purpose or something that is embedded in your personality? What if you took them for granted? So many what ifs with so many unanswered questions. And the pain just lingers forever.

~~MORE THOUGHTS~~

This is a tiny book with a big impact. Perhaps that’s why I just can’t stop writing about it. Aside from the theme of belonging, there were other things which I truly loved and had to highlight. I loved how the author has made the daily routine things into something exquisite. With friends, we do have memories of the trips we took together or the restaurants we dined at but it’s the in-between and continuity scenes which are never captured but always stay with us. For instance, the author has mentioned about “how she normally had a bird-like appetite but almost always had space for ice cream” or “the way she pedalled up a hill on her small black bike” or “her face illuminated by the glow of her laptop as she tapped away.”

The persimmon tree in the backyard of a house you rented that gets chopped down. The vintage café where you were a regular gets closed down. How you are never able to get tea like in the city you lived in. Sometimes, the people from the city you lived in pass away too.

The glory of these moments is invaluable and lives with us forever even after the friendship ends or when you move to a different city or start working at a different job. It’s those little inconsequential things which become enough to shed tears years later. This book is tiny but mighty and gets you thinking on levels you would not have imagined. I think everyone should read this book to find their own meaning within it. I have rated How Kyoto Breaks Your Heart by Florentyna Leow at 4.5/5 stars!

Until next time,