Still Born: Motherhood’s To Be or Not To Be

Posted On May 29, 2023

Hi Readers! I usually don’t get myself too invested in the Booker Prize or International Booker Prize. Something about those books just don’t call out to me. It’s either the lack of a plot or too technical literary writing or simply because of my prejudice. But, all of that went away with this year’s International Booker nominations. I was delighted with most of the books that made it to the Shortlist. I had no intention of reading them all. But, I knew I wanted to read Whale, Time Shelter and of course, Still Born. These three have been Bookstagram favorites and Still Born especially has been read and loved by so many people. This is why I picked it first and yes, I loved it too.

~~THOUGHTS~~

Still Born is a short book but talks multitudes about motherhood. Not only about having children or abstaining from motherhood, but also much more complicated ways in which motherhood has a long lasting impact on a woman’s life.

There is Laura whose decision of not having children is firm but because of this she is not able to cherish many long-term relationships. How is it fair that this one decision should come in the way of her finding her true love?

There is Alina who did not want to have children, but later changes her mind. And then she has a daughter whose brain is not fully developed and requires round-the-clock care. How is it fair every single day of being her daughter’s mother is more difficult than climbing a mountain? How is it fair to the daughter to live a life of unimaginable pain?

There is Laura’s next-door neighbour Doris who loses her abusive husband in an accident only for her son to gain his father’s rage which he takes out on her. How is it fair that she had to survive her husband’s abuses only to be tortured by her son’s tantrums which push her into depression?

There is Alina’s daughter’s nanny Marlene who loves babies but cannot have the same love for young kids over five years old and also cannot have children of her own. How is it fair for her to love a baby who is not hers with all her heart only to move on to the next one?

There is Laura’s mother who has a daughter who does not want children. How is it fair to her that she now cannot communicate with her daughter because of an assumption built into her generation because of the patriarchy?

Being a mother. Choosing not to be a mother. Being a step-mother. Being a working mother. Being a stay-at-home mother. Being a single mother. Being a mother of an abusive child. Being a mother of a special needs child. Being a mother of a human being. None of it is really fair, is it? No matter which path you choose, it is going to be filled with moments of doubts, remorse, pain – not just yours but also the society’s, but it is also going to be filled with moments of joy, content, pride – perhaps just yours. So, given that no matter what you choose, you are going to be judged and maybe that should make your decision easier. And yet, here we are, women, thinking it from a kaleidoscope of others’ needs over our own.

Still Born is a book which you will not be able to put down. It might as well be something you read in a day. It does not have a wonderful writing style, no. It does not have too many events, no. It does not even have too many characters, no. It’s not the kind of book where you can judge it by your usual parameters. With its mediocre yet gripping writing style, it will hold your attention and make you question about motherhood and parenthood. That is its intention and it does very well in relaying the complexities of parenthood. The only complaint I have from this book is that it did not shed too much light on Laura’s life, or the life of a woman who chooses to not have children. We did get glimpses of how her life is, but I would have liked those glimpses to reflect more on her emotions made from her decisions. Aside from that, this book is fantastic. It succeeds at what it sets out to achieve and makes for a profound and thought-provoking read. I have rated Still Born by Guadalupe Nettel and translated by Rosalind Harvey at 4.5/5 stars.

Until next time,